. . . in the distant, early morning . . .

I’m still sick: constantly dizzy, coughing badly.  I’m currently on medication but it looks like I’ll need to see a specialist early next week since this has been going on over a week.

But today I was sitting staring at the telly, too hot to do anything outside and too dizzy to do anything inside.  I was really, really bored. So I decided to run.  First, I had a banana and some orange juice. 

I started off slow and stayed slow compared to what I’d been doing.  I only actually ran about 1/3rd of it, and speed-walked the rest.  I had to keep a very close eye on my heart rate as it is higher than normal from the dizziness and meds.  I ran too long at one point and my heart-rate was through the roof, so I went back to a walk.

After about 17 minutes I started a cool-down, finishing on .7 miles at 20 minutes.  Shorter than previously, not that much slower, but it felt good to actually run again.  It felt really dizzying as well, and perhaps I shouldn’t be pushing myself - but I’m happy that I did.

In the shower my ear popped.  Kind of similar to an altitude change.  Then the other ear popped.  The pressure has somewhat changed ears.  I’m not sure what that is all about but I’ll report it to my doctor in the a.m.  I’m mostly worried about hearing loss, along with being permanently dizzy.

... and if I am permanently dizzy, then why put off running?  I’m going to get fit somehow, and I am not going to allow this to stop that progress.

I’ve lost some weight since starting all of this as well, which feels good.  Much slower weight loss than I want but I hadn’t really modified my diet much, so any weight loss is welcome.  In fact my diet has reverted to awful with my recent illness.  So it was a real surprise this morning when I stepped on the scale.

I’m really looking forward to sussing out what is going on with me, and hopefully fixing it.  It’s scary being dizzy all the time, and the cough is annoying.  Hopefully we can figure this thing out and, even more hopefully, find out that it is not serious.

-Lisa, on July 25, 2010 at 3:31 pm .::. Comments and Reactions

I have been biting my nails for as long as I can remember.  Very short. Gross.

I really like “pretty” hands.  Well taken care of; not necessarily lots of polish - but obviously cared for.  So this has been a major issue for me.  Plus it can lead to infections and quite honestly, is painful.

This is a hard habit to break.  Your hands just happen to follow you everywhere, after all.  I bite out of boredom, stress, nervousness, frustration, fear.  You name it, I bite.

I’ve stopped biting on and off for a few years now; a few months ago I bit all my nails off so I decided to get tips and immediately stop again.  The tips did a fantastic job keeping my nails strong and looking good while my real nails grew underneath.

The tips are off now, and all I’ve got on is some clear basecoat.  I’m probably going to put some color on, but not 100% sure.  If it chips that tends to set me off.

How do you break a habit like this? Let me be honest: I have no idea.  I’ve done it through will-power, I’ve done it through “blocking” via tips.  I’m sure I’ll re-lapse… well I hope not, but it’s very likely.  But I’ll keep trying until I’m able to not bite as the rule. 

I don’t have suggestions on how to fix this.  For me, tips helped the most.  They were stronger, smoother, and looked pretty.  For some will-power works.  A major part of my routine has been taking care of my nails every day: pushing back cuticles, cleaning, and putting on “stop biting nails” from stopbitingnails.com.  That routine, and the disgustingness of that creme, has helped convinced me not to bite. 

This is a big thing for me.  Hopefully I can keep it up.  It’s a very hard habit to break.

-Lisa, on July 23, 2010 at 12:48 pm .::. Comments and Reactions

I’m not a big fan of training collars: head halters, front-clip harnesses, prong collars, check chains, etc. etc.  I happen to own front-clip harnesses and head-halters, however, for a variety of reasons; starting with one really icy winter and a very rambunctious foster dog named Rusty.

My dogs are not perfectly leash trained.  Elka, despite over 2 years of consistent, high value, positive training, is still a really big pain in the arse on a leash.  Milton is much better, but I admittedly have not worked with him one-on-one as much as I should have.

Both of them still pull while on the front-clip Gentle Leader.  Not a lot, but when you’re dizzy already, “not a lot” is enough to destabilize you to the ground.

So tonight I fed Milton in a head-halter (Elka is already thus trained) and this evening we all went for a walk, both dogs in Gentle Leader head halters.

It was the most pleasant walk I’ve had with them since I got them.  They were both saintly after a few self-corrections which I barely felt.

Now, I will probably continue to use these so that we can have more pleasant walks.  I will continue also to train them to walk next to me on a normal collar, and will be working on the “silky fingers” technique to make them both much more responsive to neck pressure.  But that could take months, so during that time we’ll probably use the head halters.  Even though I am against them, it was that much more pleasant to walk with them on the dogs that I will use them.  The dogs don’t feel the head halter when behaving anyway.

But these are training collars and will be used as such. But between two dogs and major dizziness - well, the head halters let us go on a walk at all, so it was worth it.  They also didn’t seem to mind the head halters once they figured out how to not get the correction.

So, in short: I give up.  I surrender.  Head halters it is.

(Can you tell I feel a little bad about this?  But they work, so yea…)

-Lisa, on July 21, 2010 at 9:48 pm .::. Comments and Reactions